Tea, with Apples.

It is the early morning. I no longer miss the quiet sanctity of the mornings, nor do I long for the sunrise.

I am having tea, with apples.

I stayed up the whole night, and did nothing productive. I read 2 new webcomics, finished reading Orwell's Animal Farm (sub-par really, next to 1984) drew up vague outlines of my coming assignment, and spent several minutes cursing in vibrant language at various deities, karmic life plans and general idealogies.

It will be two days until my 80% paper is due. I have barely started work on this. It is likely for the remainder of today I will fall into a fitful, interrupted sleep. I will not say that I am procrastinating. The word implies that eventually, I will do the job, probably in the nick of time. No, I do not profess to be the Lord of Procrastination. Instead, I am lifting up the Ancient and Revered Art of Laziness beyond the levels mere mortals hope to achieve, transcending the mundane, and am on the very cusp of becoming the patron divinity of Laziness. And LO, I shall be a just and mighty God, for I have many worshippers, and will bestow upon them all the blessings of my soon-to-be pantheon.

Visions of madness aside, I am probably well and truly fucked for this assessment, and my divine powers do not manifest until after I fail this term.

And what is it with Karma these days? I already know that I am failing miserably in at least one aspect of my life, I really don't need all these constant reminders cropping up everywhere like really bad sitcom cliches. OK, perhaps I do, seeing as how my ego and self-confidence sometimes borders on outright arrogance and cockiness, but startlingly harsh self-examination aside, do I really deserve all this? It's not like I'm being 'tested' by some deity, as I clearly do not subscribe to any after-life insurance schemes, and so what if I'm being an asshole about some things? Being a gentleman certainly hasn't been the pinnacle of achievement, and Wilde had said that "It is absurd to divide people into good and bad. People are either charming or tedious." Then again, most of these 'failings' are by my own hand, normally in some ironic fashion or another, in an almost macabre manner by my contradicting idealism. Either they are the result of an upbringing firmly rooted in storybooks and fairytales, or from mildly disenchanting reality-induced revelations. Then again, the entire argument is rooted in morality, making the point moot.

"I can resist everything except temptation". Also, ironically, while on the subject I am using quotes from a homosexual man. Clearly this cannot be the most encouraging of things, at this moment. This might be construed as the work of an opposing deity, to hinder my ascension to God-hood. And the time spent on this post might have finished about 1/12 of my impending assignment.

AH, Irony; when wilt thou release me from thine humorous-yet-sadistic embrace? When I ascend, Thou shalt be the first to join my pantheon, and will sit at my side as Queen. The irony implicit in mine Godly logic is infallible, and it will be so.

On an entirely unrelated note, the other day I saw this dog, it was like a small pony, except with fangs and claws, and I think it could smell the souls of small children. It was called Daisy, and I petted it. Behold, it shall be the Keeper of My Underworld, and devour the souls of heathens!

I am having tea, with apples.